I'm not sure if it is just me or if many others are currently experiencing this as well, but I have been battling immense states of disconnection.
The reason I wonder if others are experiencing it as well is that, well, for one, it makes me feel less alone in it to wonder. Also, it helps to alleviate the agony of it when I think of it as a collective experience.
As a collective, we truly are experiencing some major growing pains. I fear my world views becoming dismal these days. There's a large aspect of my perspective that sees things utterly disconnected from nature, from each other, and from Creator.
When I intentionally shift my attitude to see what we are going through as a collective as like a transforming caterpillar, in the cacoon, just preparing to become a butterfly, I feel some hope about it all. This has to be true, right!? The only way to massive change is to clear out all of the dirt, right? My own transformations have shown me this. I sure do hope it applies to us as a collective.
With all of the political division, world events, and overall lack of care for our planet, I am curious what the effects this has on our mental health. I've had a few recent experiences, in nature, with people I love, for just a few days. I have walked away from these experiences more connected than ever. A sense of wholeness comes back. I feel joy at simply being alive. Happiness overflows. Moments like these have been medicine lately.
Then, I go home. I fall back into my habit of isolating and disconnecting. I live in these brick walls, surrounded by cement and buildings everywhere. It's the city. It's busy-ness. It's much different than being immerse in fresh air and trees, where a sense of connection comes naturally into your whole being simply by being surrounded by mother nature. I know so many of us live like this. It's how our society has constructed our lives. It's how our culture is designed. Also, I believe it's a result of the last two years of our life. Not only has the pandemic separated us with deathly fear that struck us to the bone, but we experienced an upheavel of political separation that's left us arguing over belief systems. We now define each other by these beliefs. We see each other through the lense of what side we are on. So sad. I'm apart of it too. I have fallen into the game of what I think is right and true about it all too, as much as I try to see us all as human beings that are free to think and believe what each chooses to.
I hope we get back to the knowing that we are one big human family on this big spinning rock...
...connected to not only each other, but the planet. This is our home. Our time here is temporary, and what we do here leaves a major imprint on the future generations.
I'm not sure why this message is on my heart so heavy today, but I think it's because I began to question whether my recent experiences were shared by others. I'm seeking a sense of connection - within myself and to the natural world. I want to feel that spirit within me that is within us all. This morning I had a little taste of it as I was journaling. I felt a sense of returning into myself. I opened up to the knowing of the whole universe existing within me. I can find that connection during these times. I can remember who I am, as a child of the universe, and I can have faith in what is unfolding for us all.
This is possible. I have trust. I feel it now, that's evidence right here.
We are in this together. This entire experience. If the times are hard right now, then we are all going through it together. We will get through it together. What can we do, in the moment, to make the best of it?
For me, it comes back to finding connection. What gives us a sense of connection to ourselves, to others, and to this planet? We need to be seeking these experiences. Not only do we need to be seeking these experiences, but doing what we can to make meaning of the life we have right now. When our lives lack purpose, they lack meaning, which can be so depressing.
I'm okay with returning to the simplicity of that purpose at times. The purpose that I came into existence to be, to live, and to experience. If I can't find purpose beyond that, that's okay. The simplicity of my purpose is to live can carry me through on lost days. If my purpose is to simply exist, then I can make peace with the world around me. My life is meaningful in the pure existence of being alive. Of course, at times, this purpose can change as we change. Periods of our life reveal what our purpose is meant to be in that very exact time of our life. I find that my purpose cycles often. Sometimes it is to learn and grow. Sometimes it is to express my potential. Sometimes it is to know God more deeply. Sometimes it is to simply learn to love myself. Every day I may tune into a specific purpose as my heart feels that guidance.
We are made from Creation. Creation is infinitely evolving. We must be infinitely evolving. We are made from the Universe, therefore infinitely connected to the Source. I think we are meant to know this, so that we can learn to love each other like a big giant family.
So.... if you're going through some periods of disconnection, just know, I totally understand. You are not alone. We will get through this together, and we are in this together. I hope you find those moments of connection through all the disconnection. You are meant to know who you are. I wish you all the best on your journey. Have a wonderful day!